The Birth of Aera

By Roots Community Birth Center client, Deteyonce Graves

During the summer of 2021, I learned I was pregnant with my third baby. I had unmedicated hospital births with my first two daughters, but I knew I wanted a different experience the third time. My second pregnancy was especially traumatic because my cervix began to open at the end of my second trimester. It was something that could’ve been caught earlier but went unnoticed.

Even though I had a cerclage to keep my cervix closed, my second daughter was born at 32 weeks. Her birth was chaotic with no peace, and I got very little sleep prior to having her. I was supposed to have options, but I felt like no one at the hospital gave them to me or asked me questions. They took my rights away.

A friend of mine had her baby at Roots, so I looked into it during my third pregnancy. I started off at the same clinic where I had received my prenatal care before to make sure everything was normal. At 21 weeks, they told me my cervix looked good, so I transferred my care to Roots. I wanted to be at a place where I could speak up and be heard.

At Roots, they took their time and answered all my questions. It was such a difference from the clinic where I was with the doctor for only a few minutes. They just did whatever they wanted and didn’t seem to care about me. With the Roots team, I felt comfortable. I had a voice and was listened to throughout my pregnancy.

Labor and Birth at Roots

Toward the end of the third trimester, I started having contractions at nighttime, but they were not intense and would fade away. During my 39-week appointment, the midwife asked if I wanted my cervix checked. I did and learned I was three centimeters dilated. My due date of March 28 approached, and on Sunday, March 27, I began feeling some mild contractions. Then on the 28th, they died out. I thought, “The baby could come tomorrow or maybe at the end of the week.”

On March 29, I woke up, feeling a contraction that was more intense than what I’d been having. They went from 10 minutes apart to two minutes apart pretty quickly. I called the midwife-on-call at 3 p.m., and she called me back at 3:30. We decided I should go to the birth center. I was thankful my mom was able to stay with my 10- and 2-year-old daughters.

I got to Roots at about 4 p.m. They helped me get upstairs, where I laid on the bed for a little while. Side-lying and hands-and knees were the most comfortable positions for me. I wanted to have a water birth, so they ran the water. My fiancé, Michael, helped me get into the tub, and I thought I would be able to relax. However, as soon as I got into the water, I felt a lot of pressure. It came fast and hard. I didn’t even get to brace myself, and I panicked a little. I thought, “I’ve got to breathe, but it hurts so bad.” The midwife, Rachel, had started to walk out of the birth room to give us some space, but she came right back in.

Within about five minutes, I was on my hands and knees, ready to push out my daughter. Aera was born at 6:45 p.m. on March 29, 2022, weighing 7 pounds, 15 ounces, and measuring 21 inches long. I was in the middle of the tub, and the cord was short. I grabbed her and rubbed her, trying to get her to cry. The Roots team encouraged me to talk to Aera, but I thought, “Do I have to?” I was exhausted.

Soon after she cried, I pushed out the placenta and sat in the water for a little bit until I had the strength to stand up. We wanted to do a lotus birth, so the cord stayed intact. My birth team helped me and Aera out of the water, and we went to the bed, where we started our recovery and I had some water and snacks.

I looked at Aera, taking in her hair and her cheeks. I was surprised by how big she was. She looked beautiful. We cuddled and had some time to ourselves, and I got to feed her. The environment was calm, and I liked that there were not too many lights or people poking and prodding us. My blood pressure was low, so Rachel wanted to make sure it was a reasonable number before leaving the birth center.

Postpartum Care with the Roots Team

Since Aera’s birth, I have loved the postpartum care. The midwives encourage you to ask questions, and they check on how you’re doing before it gets bad. With the risk of postpartum depression, that matters.

Breastfeeding is going well, too. This is my third time nursing, and I breastfed my 2-year-old until she was 18 months old. It was not too long ago that I was still breastfeeding. Aera latched on while we were still at Roots. She knew exactly what to do, and that’s all she likes to do! She’s starting to be awake more now, so I talk to her and love seeing her eyes and her smile.

Reflections on My Roots Birth Experience

As I think about my experience at Roots, I’m happy I was able to give birth again. Before contractions started, I wondered, “How is labor going to be?” It can be different every time, and I knew I’d need to stay strong and focused. I surprised myself with how I was able to breathe and handle labor.

In addition, having my partner there made such a difference. He rubbed my back, applied pressure, and held my hand. He was so supportive and even made me laugh. As a spiritual and holistic person, Michael was also really passionate about the lotus birth. He had gone to a specialty store in South Minneapolis, where he bought pink Himalayan salt and herbs, like sage and lavender. Michael cleaned the placenta every day and kept it covered. The cord dried out really quickly and fell off in four days.

Overall, my birth experience was really nice. My favorite moment was giving birth to Aera in the water. Even though the water made my labor intensify and I didn’t get to stay in the tub for long, I successfully had the experience I wanted. When I was pregnant with my 2-year-old, I had wanted an out-of-hospital birth, but it didn’t work out because of the cerclage.

I think Aera is my last baby, but you never know. If I were to have another, I would definitely choose Roots for the whole pregnancy. I think it’s important for families to know that if you go to a clinic, they might make you feel stuck. But you’re not; you have options!